198 bet
One day, I no longer played just for fun, no longer played for excitement. I played because I needed to win. I didn't just play for fun, I played because I couldn't stop. Every time I lost, I wanted to win back, and every time I won, I thought it was an opportunity to continue and earn more. The losses were no longer normal bets, but times that shattered all my plans, all my advice, all my reasoning. And the wins were just temporary "bright spots", not enough to make me feel comfortable, because I always felt lacking, not enough.
